Cosign because it's Catchy.

In our lives...we all tend to hear certain sayings repeated...over and over.

Some are good like "Carpe Diem" or "Be great" or "Fuck your couch"!


Others are terrible.

That's what this post is about.....wack ass quotes.

Lets start with relationship quotes.


"Gentlemen never kiss and tell."

Lie. LIE!...BOLD FACED LIE!!!

Telling your friends what happened...makes you no less of a gentleman. How MANY you tell , who you tell , and how detailed you get (SON IT WAS ATLANTIC OCEAN/DASANI/GULF OF MEXICO MOIST!!! *high fives and funky cool guy daps to whole crew*) affects your gentlemanliness (I'm making up words.)

Plus everyone tells. EVERYONE. Not to salt the game but if a dude says "Nah I won't tell nobody!"...we did. And we laughed. We probably did the Kid N Play dance if you did some real out of bounds Roxy Reynolds (*cough*) trick.

Girls tell by the way. They tell their friends. They subliminally tell on the interweb via blogs/Twitter/Facebook through weak ass attempts to be "deep". So does that make her less of a lady because she told her homies you tried to push her THROUGH the headboard? I THINK NOT FRIENDS!

Also , if you told absolutely no one you either A) Deeply in love or B) just messed with an ugly piece. It's probably B. I've seen your Facebook album. You look like a Swamp Monster.

I was also put on game that girls have dudes they just choose not to factor into their body count...It doesn't work like that sweetie lmao....MOVING ON!

"Show no Love...love'll get you killed!"

Well , besides the fact that you got it from GET RICH OR DIE TRYING...a true film masterpiece...there's a bigger issue at hand.

This quote reeks of "everyone is out to get me" paranoia.

You go ahead and "don't show love"...you"ll be miserable. If you bought into this....you already are.

Simply be more discerning with who you "show love" to and you wont have to adapt this strange and overly harsh mantra.

Oh. Stop watching bad movies. That helps too. But if you're gonna watch a bad movie with a rapper...watch Killa Season. Changed my life. I too would like to cop a Carrari and have foreign chicks as drug mules...pooping on my carpet (yes that was in the movie).

"Think like a man so you don't get played like a bitch!"


What the...what the hell.

Ok lemme translate this...into English

"Be a nutbucket because that's the solution to getting your heart put through a woodchipper"

You also peep how girls promote this AFTER they good ol BF/"friend"/boo Chicken Noodle Soup's on their feelings?? Before that they sounding real Chris Brown "Young Love"...until they get deleted!

So they try to "reprogram" themselves to not care. Then they get their smash #'s up to an astronomical place that you'd never wanna know about.

....but that was never the intent. The goal was to not feel hurt again. But that doesn't matter...more hoes for everyone *hits the Icky Shuffle*

In all seriousness though...ladies you don't have to think like anyone to not get played. Just keep your eyes open and trust that intuition. You feel a situation going south? It probably is. So....x yourself out of it while you still can.

Because I'm laughing at your hurt Facebook and BBM statuses. Hard.

Plus some of the people that I know that are extremely promiscuous (both genders) are obviously tryna stuff a huge hole that can't be filled (rework this into a loose girl joke yourself). I say figure out what your real issue is...covering it with getting your genitalia moistened isn't a legit solution.

But what do I know. Like I said keep getting your slew on. I appreciate it. Who else's chest would I ogle when it gets hot?

"Nice guys finish last!"


Incorrect. Soft guys finish last. So don't let a female walk all over you. You might think youre "nice"...nope you re just a simp.

Yes some girls like tough guys/bad boys. Just like some dudes like slores. It's life. Stop crying and be yourself. Girls will dig the fact that you're genuine.


Or maybe your personality sucks. In that case sell drugs or rap or play basketball. Or do all 3 the hoes love that.

Moral of the story is....stop typing these things so I can see them. Please. PLEASE!...PLEASE!!!

L is for LESBIAN!

Aight so a few months ago I took one of the worst L's of my life. I'm a winner. I'm that guy. I don't lose baby!!...But oh...I do!

Ok so let's just set the scene shall we! Cool!

So....theres this lesbian right.

She's attracted to me. Confusing to me...very much so.

In our conversations this attraction escalates from he's cute to "I'mma rape you when I see you".

I was never one to deny someone their fun so...she decides when I get back to NYC (I was still in VA at school) We can click up and chill or something.

Now I live in Queens NY. Damn near in Long Island. She wanted to meet up in Midtown Manhattan. For my non NYC readers...the distance can be summarized here: MAD FAR SON! I WOULDNT MAKE THIS TRIP IF THE CAKES DIDNT RESEMBLE A WNBA BASKETBALL FAR!

So I get to the location (Blockheads..a bar in Midtown). She's nowhere to be found. I text her asking where she is. She tells me she's about to hop on the train... I think nothing of it. It's kinda raining and that kinda blows nuts but EH I'll be ok!(how dumb of me)


So yeah 45 mins to an hour later, I am now soaked by this rain and I'm sad like Eeyore.. Head hangin' through the grungy Manhattan streets. Various extremely profane versions of "She's dumb late" come out of my mouth. I'm calling her, texting her, BBMing her...everything! No response. I try to BBM her one more time and I notice something..

She's not on my contact list. She deleted me. I try to tweet her?? She unfollowed me. AND blocked me.

Now Im stuck in the rain...with nothing to do...none of my people know I'm out here other than Kwame (who was back in Queens). So I'm having a convo with him via BBM about this tremendous L and how much this sucks when I regain my senses and stop being a bitch. I knew KJ (@Only1KJ) was making moves that night in Manhattan. I text him to see what the move is. He's also with a lesbian (at least she showed up...stoneface)...but he's further than I feel like going. I leave the pizza shop I was sitting in (Shout out to me for paying 10 bucks for 2 slices of wack ass pizza) and just took my soaked ass (AIYO!!!) home on the train.

My parents noticed how early it was (it was around 1130). I made up some shitty story like "oh haha yeah we had to skate off early!". I wasn't in the mood to say "I got stood up by a girl who doesn't even like dudes. My jacket wet and my feet hurt. I'd like a shot of Drano with a Pine Sol chaser."

I go upstairs , sit down , and let it sink in.


I felt...better. Relieved even.

Ya see...I'm 22 years old. Never been stood up in my life. Not officially. This is why when I'm supposed to make moves with females...I'm a lil "iffy". Thinking "is she REALLY gonna show up?"...because I knew in my heart I was overdue to get stood up.

I caught my date L at 22. Lucky me -_-.

Adding insult to injury, quite a few of my Twitter followers are still friends with this girl. So every couple of days...she gets RT'd onto my timeline. Will I tell you her Twitter name? No. I'm too grown for that. She played me to the left...ugh. Her reasoning?? I'll never know. Nor do I really have time to toil over it lol....such is life! I chose to keep it classy even though what she did was EXTREMELY foul. Also...it was rather confusing.

Shout out to you though....SMH. You helped me get a fear of mine out of the way.

Now I'm not worried about getting stood up...if it happens...it happens!

WEVE SAVED HER!

I fixed my blog. It was something relatively simple....that post grad boredom allows you to fix all sorts of stuff. Stay tuned. New blog posts...soon...real soon!

New Blog (http://latenitelights.blogspot.com/)

New blog.

http://latenitelights.blogspot.com/

See ya there.